{"product_id":"demcongress-tee","title":"DemCongress Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eSomewhere between the third committee hearing and the fourteenth press release about the committee hearing, America made a discovery: \u003cem\u003ethe baboons had been running things this whole time.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe DemCongress Tee honors the left side of the aisle — where three passionate baboons in sharp suits have gathered to fight for the people, protect democracy, and also \u003cem\u003ecompletely lose the plot\u003c\/em\u003e at a podium. Passionately. With great conviction.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBipartisan Baboonary. Est. 2026.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBold black-ink design on a dignified blue tee — \u003cem\u003efor the baboon who believes in process\u003c\/em\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePremium unisex fit, comfortable enough for a 12-hour filibuster\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S–3XL — because we leave no baboon behind\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable — a promise we can actually keep\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eWear it to a town hall. Wear it to brunch. Wear it to remind everyone that democracy is messy, loud, and absolutely feral.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chirpnout","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":67632949624981,"sku":null,"price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":67632949657749,"sku":null,"price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":67632949690517,"sku":null,"price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":67632949723285,"sku":null,"price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":67632949756053,"sku":null,"price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":67632949788821,"sku":null,"price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0802\/3002\/3317\/files\/demcongress-blue-tee-white-ink.png?v=1791171011","url":"https:\/\/chirpnout.com\/products\/demcongress-tee","provider":"Chirpnout","version":"1.0","type":"link"}